This time last year my outlook on life was rather different. I was engaged to my best friend and business partner, my businesses were growing, my dogs were thriving, and we were gearing up for our Rawco Rescue Tour across Canada.
My how things can change in such a short period of time!
July 5th 2018, will be the one year reminder of the loss of my beloved Irish Wolfhound Fitz William. Little did I know that this day would be the beginning of a wild roller coaster for me.
For those of you that are new to Rawco, we have been on a bit of a hiatus. We went from socially broadcasting our rescue trip across Canada to a full blown social shut down. Why? Well to sum it up politely, and without revealing too much detail - I discovered there was an internal theft taking place within the business.
This discovery took place 5 weeks before I was walking down the aisle. Let me tell you that it felt like I was watching my entire life and world fall apart around me one wall at a time. I felt raw, exposed, unsheltered, and defeated. I could not muster up the integrity to post fun photos and comments on social media, knowing it would be one big lie. So I shut down, and transformed into an empty shell of a human being. But only temporarily!
My favourite stage of the grieving process is the anger - I’m just keeping it real. Anger is what it took to kick my ass into gear and not give up without a fight. I didn't work so hard for so long to have everything taken away from me this way, and dammit I was walking down that aisle!
So that’s what I did. I got mad, worked my butt off and everything got better. Life started to penetrate through Rawco again and yes, I did get to walk down the aisle and marry my best friend.
The anger phase in the grieving process really puts you in a grey area. You are not actually addressing any of those feelings and emotions. The grey area makes you hold on, put the blinders on and push through. Avoidance tends to make traumatic events a lot easier.
One of the greatest lessons my dogs have ever taught me is that, when faced with trouble, there can only be fight or flight, right or left, up or down. You can’t sway in between. We must live in the now and be confident in a direction. Nature at its finest, true survival.
And so Rawco is going in a new and revitalized direction. I have made peace with what happened, and think fondly of my brave and beautiful Fitz William.
To a new and bright future Rawco Pack Members!